Darkness Seeps In

The darkness comes and makes itself at home in my mind.

It seeps through my body, slowly absorbing the light that once lived there.

 

My mind races tonight. Writing is my way to process the overwhelming thoughts that swirl through my head and heart. Tonight, my fingers rest, poised over my keyboard and nothing comes. I write, and erase. Over and over. There are no words for all I see and hear and feel. My heart is hurting for too many reasons. Darkness has it caged in a strangle hold. It cannot beat in love. It struggles to find a way out.

Today is my dear friend’s birthday. She is no longer with us. She was the embodiment of light. In her absence, on her birthday, darkness crept into our world. Evil found its way to a place of celebration. This makes me angry. I was filled with fear at her loss a few months ago – fear for the world. There is no way to adequately describe the positive impact she had on all those around her. She was not always happy, but she was always filled with love. The depth of her honest love for those around her – around the world – was awe-inspiring. She found love in every day things. She found love in sorrow. She found love tangled up with hate and set them free from each other – and love would always win. I did not pay attention to her enough. I didn’t learn how to find love like she did. And now I need it. I need her.

I am fighting to honor her today by finding love. The world is working against me. There is anger and hatred and blame bandied about from all sides. I want to be like you, Sherilyn. I want to prove that #LoveWins