**CAUTION** Soapbox Ahead!

An open letter to…well…a lot of people.  Ahem….

1. To the people who realized the potential hazard to children of loose batteries from our endless electronic toys – Thank You for accepting the challenge of providing the same enjoyment in a safer way.  HOWEVER,  to whoever decided battery compartments need to be secured with microscopic screws, do you really believe sleep-deprived-stressed-out parents are capable of locating and adequately using the annoying little screwdriver necessary to change the batteries (or remove them!) from the favorite toy – the only toy that will cease the pitiful cries from a toddler in their midst?
2. To the people who listened to complaints from so many of us about the scratchy feeling from nylon tags scraping away at the sensitive part at the back of our necks – Thank You for getting those annoyances ‘off our backs’ (as it were).  HOWEVER, to whoever decided that moving those tags to the side of the shirt, where it can poke at my ribcage with every move throughout the day making me convulse uncontrollably as it stabs me – do you truly believe a tag against this even more sensitive area is a better choice??
3. To the restauranteurs who recognize that children often have different tastes than adults and offer a children’s menu with simpler fare for their young patrons – Thank You for helping to end the power struggle over food choices for families when dining out.  HOWEVER, to those who place a plate in front of a three-year-old, exclaiming “careful, it’s hot,” do you really think a squirming, anxious, don’t-really-want-to-be-here child is going to keep his hands away from the plate that holds the very food he has anticipated getting for the last hour (or so it seems to him/her)?
4. To all those who enjoy their coffee, made by someone else, at various times of the day, Congratulations that there are so many drive-thru options from which to choose.  HOWEVER, at what point in our society did it become acceptable to pull across the road, blocking traffic on even the busiest street in order to wait in a drive-thru line?   Do you not notice that your choice has caused a small traffic jam and results in ten other drivers being late for work because they can’t get around you?
5. To the stores who understand that ambiance affects a persons buying tendencies, Thank You for choosing to focus on the whole shopping experience for patrons and understanding that harsh lighting and dingy floors are not appealing.  HOWEVER, you must also be aware that your over use of fragrance is assaulting to the olfactory senses of many shoppers at your locale or anywhere in a 300 foot radius of your doors.  In addition, do you really think that playing music a decibel level that impedes casual conversation (or hearing an answer to the question “does this come in blue?”) is beneficial to the purchase experience?
6. To stores that extend their operating hours, thank you for meeting the sometimes unreasonable needs of my crazy life schedule, allowing me to pick up milk or batteries at 2:00 a.m.  HOWEVER, if you make a choice to stay open 24 hours, why must you consistently choose the two busiest hours of the day to fill the isles with large carts and cumbersome boxes while oblivious staff re-stocks the shelves?  Would it not make more sense to use times when the isles are not already full of shoppers to add carts, boxes and workers who could use some additional customer service training?
7. To the people who understand that we, as Americans, are granted the right to challenge laws and rules that we believe not to be in the best interests of society, Koodos to you for standing up and exorcising your democratic abilities with our government and law-making entities.  HOWEVER, this ability does not mean that you are exempt from these laws or rules.  Do you think a democratic society gives you the right to indiscriminately decide that certain rules do not pertain to you simply because you don’t agree with them or they are merely inconvenient to you?  Do you not see that we would be living in an autocracy and eventually in chaos if everyone made choices in this way?

(Ahem) That’s enough for now.  I will put my soapbox away.  But, as anyone who spends time around me knows….it may reappear at any time!